Ladies Night

 

As things start to return to normal, it's time to practice "going out." Now, "going out" means very different things to me at 39 than it did ten or twenty years ago. Especially sober 39-year-old me. Two weeks ago, we went to our friends house for a BBQ. That was the most people we've hung out with since before COVID. It was a beautiful sunny Friday. In the past, my husband and I would have enjoyed a drink or two after work before going to the BBQ. Then, we likely would have drank more than everyone else at the BBQ. Instead, we armed ourselves with a variety of kombucha flavors and AF beers. 

I was surprised how late we stayed. I thought we'd have dinner, hang out for a bit and head home. What is there to do if you're not drinking? Turns out that you can just sit around a fire and talk with a group of adults without alcohol. We both enjoyed ourselves and it was great practice.

Last night was my first "Ladies Night" since COVID and quitting drinking. We went to a new casino in the area that is known for having a variety of good restaurants. I figured we'd just go have dinner and come home. What else is there to do if you aren't drinking? None of the four of us drank last night. One doesn't drink, one rarely drinks (and probably was trying to support me because she's wonderful like that), and maybe the other just didn't feel like drinking or was also just being supportive. 

"Ladies Night" was a lot cheaper than it was in the past. I would have had a drink or two before, drinks at dinner, and drinks while we walked around the casino. It turns out that soda water and pop are free at bars! Why would I have known that? I wouldn't have imagined ever ordering those items before. 

What is special about these two events is that they were coordinated by the friend who inspired me to quit drinking. She is at 2.5 years now. I would't have done it or thought it was possible unless I had a friend who drank like me, successfully quit and navigate all the situations in which seemed too hard (or not fun) sober. The other friends were at both events also. So now, I have good practice hanging out with several people without alcohol, and now more people know that my husband and I quit drinking. 

We stayed out until 10:00 last night. If I were drinking, I would have thought that was totally lame, and likely would have had more at home. Sober, I was shocked we made it that late. As an introvert who loves my family/home/books, it's not always easy to motivate myself to socialize. I knew it would be so good for me to go last night and it was. My eyes are watering as I type this, and acknowledge how lucky I am to have such great friends who love me, and think I'm fun without alcohol...weird.